March Madness has come to an end

I find myself more and more using the phrase, " I just don't have any time." I used to always feel that everyone had time, they just needed to prioritize their life. But it seems that it's not that one has to prioritize, but often times it's their top priorities that are taking up all their time!

March was so incredibly crazy for us, I look back at it now and think how did I ever get through it all? Van was sick for about 24 out of the 31 days in March. It started with fever and ear infection, then followed by a fever of 103 for about 5 days, followed by a rash (which turned out to be roseola), followed by another rash, which we are 99% sure was chicken pox. Add in ballet classes, Mom's groups, scheduled play dates, and bible studies. Phew what a month! We celebrated my 30th in March as well as  Van's 1st birthday. Lilly and Van's Paw Paw and his wife came up from Texas the last week in March for a visit too. It was the first time they were meeting Van.We all had such a good time that week. The kids loved it and Lilly had such a blast with her Paw Paw.

It seems that now that we have turned the corner of Van's first year he and Lilly are growing up at a super speed each day. Lilly is most definitely ready for Kindergarten this fall. She is constantly surprising Anthony and me with how smart she is, especially her logical thinking. She truly is a sponge and you never know what sinks in and what doesn't with kids. We were having breakfast the other morning and out of no where she says, "Mom I know I disobey sometimes, but there is two reasons why I do that. One, I was born a sinner, we are all born sinners. And two, I just forget sometimes to obey." I asked her where she learned or who she heard that from about being born a sinner, already knowing that I had said that to her several times in her life, but maybe she was learning that in Sunday school or something. She said, "well YOU mom, of course. Don't you remember teaching me that?" lol  It makes me so proud to see those things stick with her. I have one very special girl on my hands, one that I thank the Lord for everyday.

Van is doing something new all the time now. He is starting to say little words and he LOVES to mimic anyone. He will cough after you cough, laugh after you laugh, blow on hot food after you do, any and all you do he does. It is really funny. He has especially taken to holding out both hands in front of him (zombie style) and making a 'monster' sound. lol He is such a typical boy and I am amazed at how different it is from girls to boys. He is getting very close to walking these days too, I love it!

I found this draft and am just gonna publish it now..even though its been 3 years. ha !! So, the dates could be off when published, but clearly it was written a while ago. oops

Let it Go

    It's been three years since I have last written anything on here. WOW! Life just gets so busy and complicated, that I often don't take the time to just sit and reflect on what is going on in our life. Let alone write it down. Our days just seem to slip right by us before we know it we are laying in bed and wondering, "did I even talk to God once today?" It has really been on my heart to lately to reconnect with him..to talk to him and let him be apart of my life more..let him be more a part of our family's lives. I think we, just being human, go through so much in life that we forget he's there waiting for us. Patiently waiting for all of us to return to him and walk with him. What we don't often think about is that sometimes our lives are out of whack-- because our relationship with Christ is out of whack.

        I attend an incredible church, I have wonderful friends in Christ, I teach my children about God at home, my daughter attends a christian school...but none of that matters unless I, personally, am living out my life for Christ, setting that example for Lilly and Van.  I can go to church every Sunday, meet with bible study groups every month, hang out with believers weekly, spout off random lines to my children about "is that how Jesus would act" when they fight until I'm blue in the face! But, if I'm not living it MYSELF, believing it and practicing what I preach, then its futile! 

       God has laid upon my heart to just let it go! Let the bitterness go, let the anger go, let the jealousy go, let the hurt go, let the sadness go..just LET IT GO. I couldn't be more sick of seeing that phrase everywhere I look, obviously due to the Frozen movie...but it hit me the other day that I-ME! just need to "let it go." There is no place for him in my heart and in my life if I am still hanging on to all of that. I feel so silly for not seeing this earlier. But, apparently it takes a while of seeing Disney phrases before you finally realize you aren't really seeing Disney...you are seeing God speaking to you!

          I'm so thankful for all my friends, they encourage me and pray for & with me and are truly always there for me to lift my spirits. Anthony and I have definitely had some pretty awful times in our marriage- at one point I stood, with my newborn baby in my arms, knowing and waiting for papers to be delivered to me. We were done. But, we weren't. We aren't. We never will be. God has gotten us through each valley, each canyon and given us HOPE. That is such an important word to us. It has so much meaning to us and without our relationship with Christ, who knows where we would be today. 

           Everyday presents its own struggles, but I am determined to live for Christ. I want my children to be the light in this dark world. If anything else, I want to be able to show them what Christ did for us, does for us, and is still doing for us each day!